Great-great-great-granddaughter of Hermann Hering—from whom I inherited, by blood, the unwavering power of perseverance and the innate courage to forge new beginnings; great-great-granddaughter of Gertrud Gross-Hering—from whom I received the gift of writing, matriarchal dignity, and a moral inflexibility that never bends the spine to adapt the Truth to the dictates of governments or the conveniences of a corrupted society; great-granddaughter of Eva Gross Schelling—who was the one that sustained, strengthened, and reinforced high culture in my blood, and who also imposed the genetically sovereign self-conviction to despise the theater of social conventions and to submit the intellect solely to the Truth; granddaughter of Ingeborg Vera von Hertwig (Schelling)—who enriched my blood with the brilliance of a unique, intelligent humor and the capacity to nourish my soul through the dedication to structuring, managing, and caring for the home, being also responsible for reinforcing, intensifying, and broadening a classical and integral feminine formation, and, above all, for handing down the inheritance of the nobility of femininity and the maternal vocation; and granddaughter of Igor Francisco von Hertwig—responsible for inscribing into my genetic code a profound communion with the Natural Order, the healing power of plants, the aromatic beauty of nature, poetic writing, and the humor of drawings, texts, and ambiguous, extremely sharp riddles; daughter of Bettina von Hertwig—who sweetened the lineage by adorning it with the purity of a sincere and humble heart, beautifying it with the singular contemplation of the Arts and Culture, and elevating the need for Beauty to the status of oxygen, making life and survival dependent upon it; granddaughter of Ida Trevisol Bittencourt (Baldessar Trevisol) and Eduardo Bittencourt—who added to and intensified in my heritage a broad mastery of modern medicine; and exclusively from my paternal grandmother, I inherited the nobility of feminine submission and the unshakable moral firmness in the Roman Catholic Apostolic Faith; and daughter of Ruy Trevisol Bittencourt—who sharpened the blade and intensified the comprehensive understanding of health already present in our lineage, carving and honing this tremendous knowledge into my intellect from my very first breath, through oral tradition, theoretical teachings, and the rigor of practical application.

This beginning might lead you to think that I have had a vastly secure and even privileged life. Yet, the reality is entirely different. I know that the people of the modern world love to read about tragedy, so I anticipate that I will not serve them the banquet I could by simply recounting how God forged me since my conception and through everything He allowed to happen to me along the way. I say this because, although my history is shocking, and though demonstrating my triumph over it could serve as pseudo-motivation for someone, my morals stand contrary to the exhibition of others’ miseries. And I do not need to convince anyone that I have lived through absurdities, that I was reborn by Grace every single time, and that I was strengthened each time God rescued and cared for me after I experienced the rot of humanity on different scales.

Perhaps at some moment in my existence, I will resume writing the history of my life, and, if I manage to conclude it while shielding it from agents tempted by the Evil One, I will leave it to be published later on or after my encounter with God in Eternity. In this space, what matters are not the abysses I was forced to cross, but the lineage, the lucidity, and the strength I carry within my Being.

It is natural that, at this point, you might wonder about my credentials. Modern society is addicted to diplomas and standardized primers. The truth I have to offer you is that my real formation does not fit within that system. I absorbed my knowledge through immersion in the environments I frequented and through a spontaneous, uninterrupted, and autodidactic quest for the most varied fields of knowledge. I possess the innate ability to self-direct, selecting with absolute rigor what makes sense and summarily discarding what does not. I tried, on several occasions, to fit myself into formal education. I started countless higher education courses, undergraduate and postgraduate degrees, but dropped out of the overwhelming majority of them. Not for lack of discipline, but due to the absolute impossibility of subjecting my mind to an educational model that consistently proved to be shallow, tedious, and, not infrequently, steeped in errors.

Out of love and obedience to God, I release all the moorings that previously insisted on chaining me. I lived in silence for decades—in order to avoid the embarrassment of others and the continuous failure of my attempts to find an echo in interpersonal relationships. For the sake of my mental sanity, today I reject the impositions of social suffocation for not possessing the credentials that please them so much, just as I repudiate the stones cast by those who retaliated when they felt assaulted by my high processing capacity and my ease in exposing the knowledge infused in my Being. The trail of this denial is bitter: in my attempt to ‘fit’ into the flatlands and not frighten others, I went so far as to delete entire works—from novels and social critiques to treatises and compendiums on health. The discovery of my profound giftedness was my rising from the ashes; it was what finally allowed me to cease this intellectual self-mutilation that has made my body sick over the past decades.

I am exhausted, and I will not apologize for being who I am, for knowing what I know, nor will I cower; if God made me this way, there is a purpose I will serve with joy and without omission. Therefore, this Cry of Lucidity is born from a real personal need and as a consequence of not finding peers for constant dialogue and the sharing of interests. Let it be known that I will use this space as the public record of my notes, perceptions, understandings, thoughts, and whatever else I may need and/or want to publish.

To those who remain confused as to who I am or how I function, I say that you may comprehend me as a philosopher, driven by the restlessness of a thinker, who employs writing to act as an intellectual.

A pleasure,

Eva Schelling von Hertwig.